The Kitchen Diary

An excerpt from my Monday evening :

5:30 pm - Arrive home from the park, wondering what to cook for dinner. Enter stage left Kit (K). Enter stage right Mayson (M). Center stage, me (T).
5:30:05
T - What should we have for dinner. Mayson, NO! Close it (walk over to pantry and close door.)
5:30:08
K - I dunno (Walk over to couch, turn on TV, computer and PS3)
5:30:33
M - WAAAAAAAAAH. MAMA!
5:30:49
T - (Pick up M) Chicken burgers or Chicken salad.
5:31:45
T - KIT!
5:31:46
K - Huh?!
T - Takes M to K. Walks annoyed back to kitchen to take stock of fridge. Decides on pasta with pesto from the farmers market, italian sausage, and leftover salad/veg.
5:33:23
T - Mayson. NO! (Latches cupboard lock to appliances cupboard while trying to cut sausage).
5:33:39
T - Mayson, NO! (Latches cupboard lock to baking pans cupboard while trying to cut sausage).
5:33:54
T - Mayson, NO! (Latches poison under the sink cupboard lock while trying to cut sausage. Latches all cupboards latchable in kitchen).
5:33:56
T - Mayson, CLOSE IT! (Closes pantry door, having opened it to get the salt 2.3 seconds earlier)
5:34:16
T- Mayson! KIT! Can you entertain your offspring for a few minutes!!!!
5:37:49
M - WAAAAAH!
5:38:49
T - KIT! She is climbing into the dishwasher?! I thought you were going to watch her.
T - CHIANTRA! DROP IT! (Taking sausage out of dogs mouth)
T - KUSA! QUIT IT! (As Kusa attacks Chiantra for no apparent reason)
5:40:09
T - KUSA! STOP IT! (As Kusa enthusiastically licks the nipple of bottle being offered to him by M)
5:40:45
T - DOGS! OUTSIDE! (Open and slam back door after chasing Kusa down to throw him out into the scarey yard where the killer patio umbrella lives).
5:41:48
K - TANYA! The pasta is about to boil over!